Joke of the day

What is the key to financial survival?

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A tight arse!

(It's totally wrong that my dad emailed me this, isn't?? With a link in the email to a woman's g-string-clad behind...)

For those unfamiliar with the phrase tight-arse (or tight-ass for the Americans) this joke probably makes no sense. I mean, what's someone's bottom got to do with money? There are a few ways to explain it. The first is when tight-arse can be substituted for the word 'serious' or 'uptight'. i.e. He was no fun out last night because he's such a tight-arse. However in this circumstance a tight-arse is someone who is reluctant to part with their money. The phrase is generally thrown around pejoratively when the said tight-arse won't share their money with their friend and/or when said friend can't see any reason why the tight-arse won't share their money [1] e.g. Even though he earns more than me, he wouldn't shout me a drink because he's such a tight-arse.

Jokes and female exploitation aside, there is actually a valid point to this statement. The key to financial survival in tough times is often to careful with one's money. It's a real sign of our spend-thrifty society that not spending money or just generally sensible with it attracts the unattractive title of tight-arse. I guess it's hard to see it as a positive attribute when most people don't see a need not to spend: credit is easier to get than a cold and most accounts have a small overdraft facility if one doesn't have a credit card. And I'm not going to get caught up talking about the millions of dollars spent (successfully) on advertising telling us how spending money on this season's LBD (little black dress) or the latest release 3D HDTV is supposed to make us happier/sexier/more attractive/cleverer even when last year's style still fits or plays DVDs perfectly etc...

Anyhoo... What our friend the tight-arse is exhibiting is "self-discipline and self-restraint in money matters", much like our Mormon friend Elder Ashton recommends. I honestly never expected to be ruminating over the words of an elder of the Church of the Latter Day Saints but my take on this is basically: don't spend more than you earn, don't live beyond your means. And, as my dear readers will know from this blog, to throw another cliche at you - this is much easier said than done!

Given the fact that I am now debt-free and have about $4,000 in savings - check the counter to the right - I think I have done a pretty good job of being a tight-arse (September notwithstanding), I just wish mine looked like hers.